Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Bucket List #1: Moving Out

Being independent is something I thought I cannot do. Living on my own freaks me out. Having to do my laundry, cook food for myself, and clean the house, stuff like that. I don’t think I can do all those things. But my job calls for it. I work in Libis and I live in Pasay. My shift was changing back then, night shift to mid shift. At first, my parents wouldn’t agree with me to rent a condo near the office. But then, I tried to persuade them because I really need to find out how to live alone. I want to have my independence. Finally, they let me go. I was nervous at first but I need to prove them it was the right decision. There’s no turning back now.

My first unit was with my 3 girl friends, the KK girls. It was fun though the space was too crowded for us. We had so many crazy and fun moments in that unit. Drunken moments, crying time, crazy games, UAAP games, love blossoms and babies were made. Hahaha! If I can live with them again, I will. But we have separate lives right now. We have different priorities already, I guess. I had problems too with some roomies. You can’t please everyone, even your friend. My second unit was a disaster. It was like living with monster mom. I had a roommate who’s even worse than my mom. Seriously! I never thought it would end our friendship. Oh well.. Things happen for a reason. And now, I live with a friend, just the 2 of us. I get to experience how it’s like to be alone. Really! It’s when I go home at night and she’s not yet there. I get to feel how to live alone, literally and emotionally. It was scary at first. I feel lonely and sad. I feel pain. But then, it gives me the time I need to think about my life, about what I want to happen. Being independent doesn't have to feel you're alone too. I got lost. I realized I need to find myself again. I need to do things for myself and not for other people. I need to find my own happiness instead of relying on someone else to make me happy or make me laugh. That’s the time I realized, I need to stand on my own feet and be strong!

Living alone is scary…. But it’s also fun. You just have to allow it.

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